5 Tips for Making Divorce Easier on your Children

The divorce process brings along many stressors – some avoidable, some not. While it is undoubtedly difficult on you, keep in mind the emotions and feelings your children are experiencing. Depending on their age, they will process everything differently, but there are some actions you can take that will benefit them no matter their age. 

 

  1. Control what you say – and how you say it – around your children. Study after study shows that children can have adverse, lifelong effects of witnessing conflict between their parents. It can be tempting to vent about your ex to anyone who will listen, but that “anyone” should never be your children. Your children have their plates full processing their own feelings. 
  2. If at all possible, you and your spouse should tell your children together. Plan the venue, timing, and script for breaking the news to your children. You don’t want to tell them fresh off a verbal fight with your soon-to-be-ex spouse or give them any unnecessary details. Generally, they will need to know what is happening, how it will affect their day-to-day, and to be reassured that your divorce is not their fault. 
  3. Strongly consider a collaborative divorce. Rather than going to court, many divorcing couples choose to stay out of contentious proceedings and settle their divorce as amicably as possible using a collaborative divorce process. There are many elements in this type of divorce that differentiates it from litigious divorces, but one benefit is that it can help shield your children from some of the stress and anguish they would otherwise feel. Another benefit is the presence of third-party professionals, whose purposes are to advise spouses on best practices. One professional you may request is a child specialist. 
  4. Reiterate that the divorce is not their fault. This should be addressed when you break the news to your children. However, your messaging should include saying this to your children whenever you think they might need reinforcement. Children can internalize guilt when it comes to divorce, so be sure to hammer this point home. 
  5. Seek counseling – for your children and yourself. Choosing to see a family counselor is never a bad decision for anyone involved. A therapist can help you and your emotions be more stable during the process, which will also help your children. 

 

 

Conclusion

One more thing you can do to make the entire process easier is to retain the services of a caring, knowledgeable, and experienced attorney. The Law Office of Ray Garcia, P.A. would be honored to help you and your children navigate your Florida divorce. Please call us today at 305-227-4030 or contact us through our website.